Cabo Verde Shock Uruguay as Group Stage Chaos Erupts

Geoffrey Ashworth

Four nil. [pauses] You look at that scoreline in Atlanta, Spain completely dismantling Saudi Arabia, and if you're- if you're just reading the papers, you think, "Well, job done, absolute class." But- but wait a minute. I- I- I watched those ninety minutes, and yes, Spain had, what, seventy-two percent of the ball? But it- it- it wasn't the total football of the late aughts. It was more... [reflective] well, it was more like watching a cat toy with a ball of wool. Saudi Arabia looked absolutely leggy by the hour mark. It was... uh, it was professional, yes, but let's not write the coronation songs just yet. My dad used to say, "Geoff, never judge a team's engine when they're running downhill with the wind behind 'em." And that's exactly what Atlanta felt like. [chuckles] A lovely stroll in the Georgia heat, but hardly a test of their metal.

Geoffrey Ashworth

Now, Philly... Philly was a bit different. France putting three past Iraq. Clinical. That's- that's the word the broadsheets will use tomorrow. [measured] "Clinical." But to me, it was more like a... a well-oiled corporate machine. No fuss, no extra flair, just... bang, bang, bang. Iraq gave them some proper physical stick in the first twenty minutes, mind. I mean, they- they really put the boot in. But France just... [calm] they just absorbed it, didn't they? It- it reminded me of those classic mid-seventies Leeds sides under Don Revie--not that France plays with that level of... shall we say, "dark arts," but they have that same- that same chilling inevitability. You- you- you just knew the first goal was coming, and once it did, the game was dead. Dead and buried. And then we had Argentina in Dallas. A steady two-nil over Austria. Now, Austria are no mugs. They- they- they set up a proper low block, two banks of four, very tidy. But Argentina just... [reflective] they have that patience, don't they? It's like watching a master tailor. They just snip away, snip away, until the whole thing unravels. It wasn't flashy, but it keeps the momentum building. Though, I do wonder... are we actually seeing dominance here, or is this just the modern gulf in resources showing itself? Back in my day, a group-stage matchup still felt like a- like a cup tie. Now, these early games... sometimes they feel a bit like a training exercise for the top tier. It makes you long for a bit of... well, a bit of proper, unpredictable chaos.

Geoffrey Ashworth

And speak of the devil, didn't we get exactly that in Miami? [laughs] Good heavens! Uruguay two, Cabo Verde two. Now, if you'd told me before kickoff that Cabo Verde would take a point off Marcelo Bielsa's side, I'd have told you to go and- and put your head in a bucket of cold water. Uruguay looked... well, they looked completely rattled. Bielsa's high press... when it works, it's- it's poetry. But when it doesn't, when the legs get tired and the opposition has the pace to break... oh, it's like a house of cards. Cabo Verde were absolutely magnificent. Direct, brave, running directly at the center-backs. It was a proper, old-school thriller. The sort of game that makes you spill your tea all over your trousers. I- I- I was practically shouting at the telly by the eighty-fifth minute. It's fantastic for the tournament, absolutely fantastic. It proves that if you- if you have the courage to actually go at these big boys, they- they- they can bleed.

Geoffrey Ashworth

Then, of course, you had Norway and Senegal in New Jersey. Five goals! A three-two win for the Norwegians. It was... [sighs] well, it was defensive anarchy, let's be honest. Brilliant for the neutral, but if I were coaching either of those sides, I'd have spent the post-match press conference with my head in my hands. No control in midfield whatsoever. It was just... transition after transition, like a basketball match. Fun, yes, but you don't win tournaments playing like that. And speaking of- of lacking control, what on earth is going on with Belgium? A goalless draw with Iran in Los Angeles. Flat. Absolutely flat as a pancake. It was... oh, it was dreadful to watch, if I'm being honest. Like watching Sheffield Wednesday on a wet Tuesday in January, but without the charm. [chuckles] No urgency, no- no imagination. Iran deserved their point, make no mistake. They defended like lions, but Belgium... [frustrated] they look like a team that's- that's run out of ideas before the tournament has even properly started.

Geoffrey Ashworth

[reflective][pauses] Looking ahead to tomorrow... we've got some cracking fixtures. England against Ghana in Foxborough. Now, that... that is going to be a test of nerve for Southgate's lads. Ghana will be incredibly physical, incredibly fast on the break. If England play with that- that slow, sideways passing we've seen sometimes, they'll get caught out. They really will. And then Croatia taking on Panama. Croatia, with all that veteran experience in midfield... you'd expect them to control it, but Panama are... well, they're unpredictable. They play with a bit of- of directness that can upset the rhythm of a side like Croatia. It's... um, it's set up to be a fascinating day of football. Right, that's enough from me. My tea's gone cold. I'll catch you all tomorrow.